Excuses... Dammit, I have to get real!

Let's see... Of course!


I'm "Too Old" .... Hell, why should I even be trying? Who am I trying to kid, it's not like I'm in my 20's or even my 30's or 40's!!! What the hell is the point of trying? I'm old and I'm fat - It's SOOOOO bloody hard to find the energy to do anything!! Let alone organise all the meals and what the hell 500 calories a day excercise??? What the? And is it actually humanly possible for someone my age to burn 1000calories??? SSS ... Bloody Hell!!


Ok... Kick, kick, kick... fair up the arse... don't be so bloody negative!! Of course I can do this! Just step away from the computer and put some of THAT time and energy into my excercise sessions. I know, I'm not burning as many calories as I thought I would... know what that means??? I'm healthier & stronger than I want to admit, & I need to step up more & PUSH IT!!!



I'm too "Disorganised". I'm always running late, the house is a mess, the dishes aren't done and I'm tired.


Again... "Step away from the computer" and just do what needs to be done!! For f*#ks sake I know what needs to be done, just do it. I waste sooooo much time just thinking about what I should do (Paralysis by Analysis anybody??). If I just did it straight off... well it would be done, wouldn't it???




I just need to relax and have a drink... I've had a hard week, day, hour... the last 5 minutes were a bitch (Ok, the fact that I'm writing this after having a drink is not good... but I didn't pour it until AFTER I did my 30 minutes on the treadmill... and it's my first drink since last Saturday! ).

OMG Are you listening to yourself?? Are you even counting the calories (nope... just ignoring the whole sorry mess really!) Wouldn't it have been a better idea to organise a nice dinner and clean up the kitchen. Then tomorrow morning I'd be ready to hit the ground running for a SSS session. "Shaking of Head" Obviously I know better. It will improve!!


It's TTOTM ... yep it really is, and WHY is this still happening at my age??? Where the hell is the shut off button for all this hormonal crap?? I don't want any more children, haven't for 20 years or more. I think Mother Nature got the time frame for all this entirely wrong!!

Actually for this one I'm kinda happy with myself this week.. was feeling crap yesterday afternoon (now I know why) but, I still went to my PT session. Yay me!! Wasn't the best session, but at least I still JFDI. Thanks Mish..   it is working... slowly but surely, I'm changing for the better.


And that last sentence is what it's all about really... I am improving, making small changes, getting closer to being the person I envision myself to be. I will achieve this. Yes, sometimes it is a step backwards... but how many steps forward did I achieve first. I am improving, and for that I am eternally grateful. It will continue. I will be the person of my dreams, not of my nightmares.